Thirty Drinks
by Satan Abraham
Summary: Yeah, this was totally worth getting like thirty drinks thrown in your face earlier. Crofioh. Oneshot.


After getting about thirty drinks thrown in your face, you're about ready to just give this up. Really, if you're not going to get laid, you can just leave already. Then again... you can always bitch to Kankri about this tomorrow, maybe loudly so that some of the nicer trolls can feel bad about it. Yeah, you'll stay for that. And, besides, there's still a while left. Something awesome could still happen.

Everyone's gathering in the corner, apart from Kankri, who looks absolutely mortified, tugging on his sweater, pacing back and forth. You wonder what's going on. It's probably something awesome.

You decide to ask Kankri.

"Hey, what's going on?" you ask. He huffs, crossing his arms tightly.

"They're spinning the bottle. To see which two of them get to go in that _closet_ and..." he trails off.

You know what he's talking about and you want in. You'll apologize to him later. After you get to make out with one of those choice cats. Meenah, maybe. Or Latula. Maybe even Porrim... any of them would be awesome, really. Yeah, you'd be fine with any of them.

You squeeze your way into the circle, grinning. Meenah makes a face.

"Reely?" she says. You smirk at her.

"C'mon, it's totally not fair that any of you should miss a chance to make out with me," you say. She snorts. You glance around at the others. Alright. They don't seem too pissed. You can escape this without too many bruises. You settle back. You're squished in-between Latula and Porrim, which is probably the best place you could've picked, because even if their spins don't land on you, you're still squished in-between them and it's pretty awesome.

It's Rufioh's turn. He looks at Horuss, manages an awkward grin, and spins it. He puts a little too much force into it and it's taking forever to stop, but from the way it's going it could totally be you. It totally could. It passes you... there's still enough spin in it for it to hit you again... and it does.

A grin spreads across your face. You look at Rufioh, trying to ignore Horuss, who looks about ready to kill you. Rufioh sighs. You can't hold in the joy anymore.

You jump to your feet, grinning wider than ever. "Guess who gets to make out with the hottest troll in our session?" you crow, grabbing onto Rufioh's hand and pulling him up.

"Oh, man..." he mutters as you ignore the stares and pull him into the closet. "How about... we don't and then say we did? 'Cause I'm pretty sure Horuss is going to kill you... I can tell him that we didn't actually do anything, and he might be a little more lenient..."

It's pretty dark, so you have to go on instinct so that you don't give yourself a black eye on his horns, but you lean into him, your hands on his shoulders.

"He's going to kick my ass anyway, I might as well get something out of it," you say. He sighs.

"It's so small in here..." he says. "Not really much room for my wings... but I guess we can, if you really want to... just don't mark me up too much, he'll probably rip your head off if you do that."

Yeah, you don't really know what you're doing, so you're not going to promise him anything. But, from what you can see, you're in prime position to kiss him now, and you are totally going to go for it. You adjust yourself so you're straddling his legs and go for it.

You miss his mouth by about an inch, the combination of the shadowy darkness and your inability to really see anything anyway making it near impossible to get it right on the first try. He laughs a little. You're so glad that he can't see your face turning violet right now, because you're seriously blushing. He's more experienced, though, and guides your face back to his. He kisses you, slipping a little tongue in there once you get over the fact that you're kissing Rufioh Nitram. You are completely at his mercy, arms hooked around his neck and body pressed into his as close as you can get it. He knows what he's doing, arms around your waist, under your shirt, stroking your skin. He pulls at your shirt and for a moment you don't know what he's doing, until he pulls it up and over your head. You move away from him so that he can get it off. He pushes you off of him entirely, and now you're flat on your back in this strangely large closet, Rufioh Nitram hovering above you.

He leans down and kisses you again, hands on either side of your head, knees holding your body in place. This is so unbearably hot. You're so turned on right now. You unintentionally moan when he starts going at it a little more intensely, mouth open, tongue making an appearance every so often. You kiss back as well as you can, but you're really no match for him.

He pauses for a break, breathing heavily. "We've got a little time left," he says. "Up for something more?"

You have to make a conscious effort to move your tongue. "Does this door have a lock?" you ask, your voice a little higher than usual. He reaches up and fiddles with the doorknob.

"Nope."

You think about it for about five seconds. "Yeah," you say, and his teeth flash once in the darkness. He reaches down, fiddling with the button on your jeans. You squeak a little, wishing that you weren't so loud. It takes him way too long to get your button undone, but your bulge is already ready to go, and his pants aren't as tight, so they're easier to get down. He lets your bulge curl around his hand and you make a funny noise in the back of your throat, trying to hold back somewhat. He puts his other hand over your mouth.

"Shh," he says, and there is nothing hotter than Rufioh Nitram stroking your bulge, hand over your mouth, telling you to be quiet. Naturally, you respond with more noise, and his hand presses down harder on your mouth. He kisses your chest, stomach, placing sloppy kisses all the way down. You're making way too much noise, whining and moaning behind his hand, and when he manages to untangle your bulge from his other hand, letting his bulge in on the action, you get even louder. The contrast between your body temperatures is so incredibly obvious and so incredibly _hot_. He presses his body against you, not quite willing to totally fuck you but willing to do almost everything else. He's making a few little noises, too, his face pressed into your chest so hard you're pretty sure his teeth are going to leave marks.

Someone raps on the door. "Time's up!" someone that sounds like Meulin shrieks.

"If you're not out in ten seconds I'm coming in," Horuss says. Rufioh sits up, pulling his pants up and throwing your shirt at you. You fumble with it, managing to throw it over your head in a fair amount of time. It might be inside-out, but you're sure nobody will notice… right? _Right. _Wait, shit, your pants. You give one mournful look at Rufioh, effectively wasting half of the time you have left, and then just manage to get your pants up and buttoned before Horuss kicks in the door.

Rufioh slips out, giving Horuss a slightly awkward smile, and you're pulled up by the front of your shirt and pushed against the wall. Okay, wow, you can't actually breathe.

Horuss is still smiling, which is, to be honest, really creepy, but there is absolutely nothing cheery and fun about what he says next. "I will let it slide this time," he says, his knuckles digging so deep into your skin you're fairly certain it's going to bruise. "But if you go near him again…"

He goes off on something and you're not really paying attention, instead focusing on Rufioh, who is making a pretty obvious 'call me' gesture. Once Horuss lets go of you and turns away, you flash Rufioh a grin and nod, watching him as Horuss leads him away.

Yeah. This party was totally worth those thirty drinks getting thrown in your face.

* * *

**oh my god this was so much fun to write you don't even know**


End file.
